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Really? I thought that was only a thing women in prison did. “And that time I used the cantaloupe?”Įven my husband was shocked at the cantaloupe revelation. “Oh, what about paper towel rolls?” my oldest added. “It didn’t feel that good, so I only did it once.” “Yeah, but it was on low, don’t worry,” he reassured me. I’d lost my deadpan expression the moment I picture my son losing his penis in a vacuuming accident. “OK, don’t laugh, but one time I put my penis in the vacuum hose,” my youngest said. Hey, who was I to judge? As a teen, I’d had an amorous moment or two with my favorite bottle of perfume, Love’s Baby Soft, which, if anyone remembers, was totally shaped like a dildo. As he spoke, my younger son nodded his head emphatically. Whatever is within reach, really,” he shared. Heck, I’ll use dirty laundry if it’s there. “Let’s see, there’s good old wadded-up toilet paper, towels, even shirts.
Like machine gun fire, my eldest son listed his favorite masturbation props. I was in for a surprise with their answers. Naturally, I first turned to my husband and sons to learn more. More: Labiaplasty, vodka tampons and more scary teen “trends your kids are sick of hearing about Learning about socks, and laughing my ass off watching the Bridesmaids scene where a mom describes cracking her son’s comforter, made me curious about what other means boys employ to get their (pun intended) socks off. All it took was one time grabbing a sock that was hard as a rock and I was done. I swear I won’t even touch his laundry anymore. “Socks?” I had never heard of boys sexualizing slippers. “I don’t know about condoms,” my friend Tammy said, “but I found out my son Charlie was using socks.” Oh, well, OK,” was all I managed to say.Ī week later, while out for drinks with my girlfriends, who also had teen boys, I asked if that was normal. His hesitation should have been my first clue. More: This teenage girl just got fired for speaking up about inequalityĮven as my own sons grew, I didn’t understand just how resourceful boys could be, until I questioned my then-12-year-old about why he had a giant box of condoms in his bedroom. Like, so good I would make sure to climb that pole every morning and every lunch.” But one day when I climbed something weird happened. When using a search engine such as Google, Bing or Yahoo check the safe search settings where you can exclude adult content sites from your search results Īsk your internet service provider if they offer additional filters īe responsible, know what your children are doing online.“At first,” he explained, “I just climbed because I liked to see how fast I could get to the top. Use family filters of your operating systems and/or browsers
Other steps you can take to protect your children are: More information about the RTA Label and compatible services can be found here. Parental tools that are compatible with the RTA label will block access to this site. We use the "Restricted To Adults" (RTA) website label to better enable parental filtering. Protect your children from adult content and block access to this site by using parental controls. PARENTS, PLEASE BE ADVISED: If you are a parent, it is your responsibility to keep any age-restricted content from being displayed to your children or wards. Furthermore, you represent and warrant that you will not allow any minor access to this site or services. This website should only be accessed if you are at least 18 years old or of legal age to view such material in your local jurisdiction, whichever is greater. You are about to enter a website that contains explicit material (pornography).